Mothers in the Home
Satguru Sivaya Subramuniyaswami , 1999-03-12
Today Gurudeva talks about controlling television in the home, deciding what to watch and enjoying it as a family, but not letting television interfere with communication and sharing. He explains the Monday home evening when the whole family gets together, not to watch television, but to appreciate and enjoy each other. And Gurudeva continues to talk about "mom in the home," how before World War II, mothers were in the home, and delinquincy was rare.
Today at Kauai Aadheenam, March 12th.
Well, we began today with finishing up our CD on 'Drug Free Kauai'. It is our gift to our beautiful county of Kauai. We want to make the county of Kauai, a drug-free zone. If you would like to have a copy, we will be happy to see that you get a copy. Make an inquiry by writing to me in the little box that says, 'Questions for Gurudeva'. It is about seventy minutes long and I think you will enjoy it.
We have been talking a lot about the home and a question on what to do about television in the home has come up.
Of course, a family watching television together is a togetherness, providing it is a choice that everyone enjoys. They can laugh together, talk together and talk about it afterwards. But there should be an afterwards and a before. Television should not consume all of the time. Before the TV is turned on, the family sits together, talks about the day, praises each other, decides what they are going to watch. Make a mutual agreement among everyone. Sit down comfortably, enjoy. Then afterwards, take half-an-hour to discuss what had been seen. Explain to the children. Let them partake of your wisdom if you are a Dad, or if you are a Mom. Never send the kids off to bed while the Mom and Dad continue watching another program and another program and another program. That is a very cold way to run a family. Why? Cold, because there is no communication with humans takes place.
So, treat the television like you would going to a movie. The whole family gets in the car as they used to do. A big event! Go to the movie house, buy a ticket and go in. Buy some popcorn and some soda. Have a wonderful time. Come home and enjoy one another's company.
Is that good advice or is that good advice! I think, it is very, very good advice. Thank you for asking more questions about how to improve family life within the home.
There is another way. It is called Monday evening at home. 'Monday Home Evening' is practiced within many religions, including the Hindus. It is a home, where there is no television. It is a home on one day a week, on Monday, which in our case is Siva's day, the family gets together. They have a wonderful meal. They play games together. They appreciate one another's good qualities. They don't solve any problems on that day. They love each other and everybody has a voice, from the little kid, to the oldest. Family togetherness one day a week. Everyone will look forward to having Mom and Dad at home.
Now, I know for many it is not a very popular subject, having Mom in the home. After the Second World War in the United States, Moms left the home and never went back. They were needed in airplane factories and shipyards because the men were all off to war. But before the Second World War and before the First World War, Mom was at home. 'Delinquency' - that was not a word in anyone's vocabulary. If a teenager made some mischief, the family was held responsible by the community. Things were pretty regulated in those days, but all went crazy when Mom left home and never went back.
Well, we have two good advices. Treat television like you would going to the movies. Gather the family together on Monday evening.
Now, that doesn't mean Tuesday, if you miss Monday. That doesn't mean Wednesday, if you miss Tuesday. It is always Monday. The whole life has to adjust around that, job and everything.
So, I will be seeing you in our familiar place. We'll have darshan together tomorrow.